If I was a zombie I wouldn't take shit from nobody
I would drive alone in the carpool lane and if the cops
Didn't like it I'd bite them in their cop arms and smile
My rotten smile and then I'd hit the gas on my way to
A zombie convention somewhere, maybe in Florida,
Where I'd gamble my zombie inheritance one nickle at a time
And if I won I'd shout "Aggaaa shla ragga toasd chomp chomp!"
Then shamble my badass self to the all-you-can-devour buffet
Freshly warm human flesh laid out on white linen tablecloths
The background dinner music chainsaws and shrill screams
And after I finally got my fill I'd go out and vote Republican.
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8 comments:
I think this is the best poemagaard so far.
I agree with Kellly. I'm going to submit it to Ploughshares under my name.
I am neither a Republican nor a plagiarist, although this poem made me consider both ways of life in a new way.
In my old, broke-down car, I could only pick up AM radio, so I listened to a lot of Sean Hannity. He makes me want to die.
And when you do, Sean Hannity will feast on your corpse at a convention.
Thanks guy, I summoned my inner zombie while I was unable to sleep last night. He was ugly, yet fun. Imagine a whole story told from his POV.
Anyone who votes Republican in the next election must be some sort of zombie...
Sean Hannity is a flesh-eater; I don't think even Bill O'Reilly could argue with that.
I meant to say "guys", not "guy", in my previous comment. I don't talk like this:
"Hey, guy, how are you?"
"Just fine, other guy!"
"Why don't we just jump off a bridge?"
"Sounds good, guy!"
Say ya'll and be done with it.
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